How readable is your proposal? Readability metrics that improve proposal quality - February 8th, 2012, by Fergal

Larry Newman of Shipley posted this example of poor writing the other day. It was part of a very active discussion thread about overused clichés on the APMP linkedin group:

“To ensure optimum delivery of services for its membership, Mini Healthcare of Elbonia will leverage the administrative and legal structure of its parent company, Maxi Healthcare, Inc. to administer a cost-effective combination of local plan operations and shared corporate resources that ensure a person-centered, outcomes-focused approach to delivering managed care services.”

It was taken from a proposal he was reviewing (actual names removed). You should take a look at the entire thread; it has a lot of good stuff around clichés. As author of the Shipley proposal guide, Larry is extremely well qualified on the subject of ‘trash talk’ in proposals. (more…)

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